WhaT The RuDDy HeLL Is LiFe aLL AbouT?

zzzz sianz.... wth life... damn life. whats the point man? its extremely meaningless. i'm tired. really tired... juz wanna close my eyes and never wake up. i dun want to face anything, or anyone. life is juz a pile of shit, a pile of dung. damn disturbing thing- life. it sucks. kill me. whats the point in everything? pointless. might as well heck care. my tiredness, my pain, my hurt... no one will see. neither will anyone care. i wanna leave this world. really. i cant stand it anymore. i'm falling. see how long can i stand? fall. soon. i'll juz stand until one day i cant stand and juz die off. doesnt make any difference to anyone anywayz. life sucks. i hate life. i hate myself. hell tired. i wanna give up. who will know how painful it is? how tired i am? how hurt i feel? or who would even bother?? no one. thats the conclusion. i had to be strong in front of everyone. had to act like i'm in a good mood everyday. had to hide all my pain. no one will know or shall know. its not easy to be me. not easy to understand. but dun ever try man. its not a toy. nothing fun to play with. suffocate me, the pain. can i juz sleep forever? i'm tired... i dun want to do anything else anymore.... my limit... my energy...all of it...are being used up already. i'm glad, at least i made it. the camp... i could stand until the camp is over... so now even if i fall dead, its alright. i wanna thank everyone for their help at the camp... but its time for me to leave, which i actually hope its soon, then my time is up. i wanna juz leave this world. this meaningless life. this life of hatred. everything hurts me. juz let me die, why torture me?? why muz everyone do this to me? no, they didnt. i have completely no idea. everything seems wrong to me. everything feels so wrong to me. wth. i'm tired....